Tuesday, May 31, 2011
Monday, May 30, 2011
Friday, May 27, 2011
"My grandmother was a deeply religious woman. And maybe a little schizophrenic. She heard the voice of God out loud. When Gran said God was watching us, she meant it literally. My concept of our lord and savior developed as something less like Santa Claus and more like Rutger Hauer in "The Hitcher".
God, to me, was the Boogeyman. And anyone with any sense eventually outgrows the Boogeyman.
So I don't play pretend. I don't go lobbying some great puppet master in the sky who, if he does exist, certainly has more important things to attend to than whether or not I get to work. I don't put stock in fortune tellers or brownies or devils--
Or I didn't, until I saw one with my own eyes.
I guess what I'm saying is, if a devil like Osborn can exist, then given nature's fondness for balance...
Then maybe... Maybe there's a cause to be made for Santa Clause."
Number of championships aside, there is only one factor that I need in order to think this statement is complete crap: Jordan made his teammates better. It's that simple. Pippen is an amazing player but who else did they have? Luc Longley. Toni Kukoc. Horace Grant. BJ Armstrong. These were all championship caliber players while with Jordan and nothing afterwards. Who did James bring up? Nobody. He had some good talent in Cleveland but he was not able to bring anybody up to his level in order to win. He's too egotistical to do that. So what does he do instead? He brings his friends to one team to build an "all-star" roster to win. Dwayne Wade is amazing. Chris Bosh is great. He doesn't have to help them, he can just ride coattails to the end. Jordan never had to get Barkley to join him. He never needed John Stockton to come help him run point. David Robinson was never invited to come to Chicago and win. Jordan made sure everyone he had was all he needed by making them better players with him. Lebron didn't want that so he just brought his own Dream Team together and it's a shame that will downplay his talents for years. Hell, even Kobe did it and we all know how I feel about him
The Finals are set to start Tuesday and it's Dallas against Miami. Sadly, this will be the only time that I ever root for Dallas to win.
Wednesday, May 25, 2011
(Thar be spoilers ahead....)
All three Lantern books came out this week (Lantern, Corps and Emerald Warriors) giving us parts 7-9 of the 10 part story. Everything was nice and connected with these issues so it would be a shame to separate them into which was the more exciting issue.
In part seven, we have Hal and Guy trying their best to break into the Green Power Battery and releasing Parallax so that the Corps can be released from the clutches of Krona's mind. With three parts still after this issue, it's a safe bet it wouldn't happen. Outta the blue come Krona and the Guardian Entities to stop them. After some cool fighting, Krona gets Guy and Hal chained up and dressed in Guardian robes. He begins to tell them that they are the most powerful ones and that they shall be turned into his new Guardians and rule the universe by his side.
Part eight next begins with Kyle and John going after Mogo. Under the control of Krona, Mogo is sending out GL rings in abundance to build a new army. They race to it's heart/ring in the hope that Kyle, while now a Blue Lantern, can heal it's mind and release it. As he tries, they are attacked by other GLs and soon discover that Mogo has all the Black power from Blackest Night still stored inside him. John, in being an Indigo Lantern now, does the only thing he can think of. He siphons out the Black energy and takes aim at Mogo. With the utterance "God forgive me." john fires, blowing Mogo up and killing it in the process.
With Mogo now dead, the connection Krona was using through him takes a hard hit. It allows Hal and Guy to break free of their chains, grab Ganthet and eventually run into John and Kyle as they teleported away from the blast. They all join forces to break out Parallax but it's not working. Ganthet awakens just in time to give them the other Rings that are not being used, giving Hal a second one in Avarice and guy a second one in Love, and they unleash in what is one of the coolest panels of the whole story so far (as seen to the left). Sadly, just as Ganthet came to, so did the other Lanterns and, still under control, they won't let them finish the job. Ganthet tells Guy it's up to him. That he wields the "two extreme rings" and that he may be their last chance. Guy must feel his deepest love and his deepest hate in order to do this. His hate of his rage and his love for the Corps. Busting out Parallax frees the other GLs from Krona and turns the table. On the last page, we get the set-up for all the Corps against Krona and the Guardian Entities.
I have been pleasantly surprised by this story. It's has a lot more cohesion and fluid writing than I was giving it credit for at the start. Other than there apparently only being one Earth Lantern to our sector after this, I have no idea what will happen by story's end and I love that. It's safe to assume that Hal lives and we've seen Guy on covers after this but who knows what will happen. I personally wouldn't mind seeing John or Kyle giving their life to save the day. One of them should go out with a blaze of glory. Guess we'll find out next month when the final part comes out.
In the sequel, the Wolfpack (minus Doug... again...) is lost in Bangkok after Stu's "bachelor party" goes horribly wrong and they must find his bride-to-be's brother.
Literally, take the first one, replace the tiger with a monkey, the stripper with a Thai stripper, and Doug with the new brother and you have #2. I will say, however, that I very much enjoyed this movie. I laughed the entire time at all the same crude jokes as the first one. From seeing Chow's neked groin again to Stu singing a little diddy about the fiasco to somebody finding pictures of the night at the end (only on a phone instead of an actual camera). The formula was exactly the same and thus, extremely predictable but it did manage to get those laughs in all the same.
There's really not much to say about this one. If you enjoyed the first one, you will enjoy this one. If not, you should stay away from it. It really is that simple.
Tuesday, May 24, 2011
So here's Korn - Get up (and yes, there is vulgar language)
Monday, May 23, 2011
USoT was the story of Tara Gregson and how she and her family dealt with her Dissociative Identity Disorder. It stared Toni Collette as Tara and all of her "alters" including a dude named Buck, a teen whore named "T" and and a June Cleaver-type house-wife named Alice. This show was great. The family was messed up and mean and vulgar and they had real problems and they were real people that we all related to. Everyone knows one of the characters on this show. It's quite amazing. And now it's over.
So pick up the DVDs. Or rent 'em. Or download 'em. I don't mind which way but this show deserves to be watched.
Sunday, May 22, 2011
What happened to the supernatural stuff?!
When angels were brought in, it made sense. We've been getting demons and, logically, that should mean angels exist in this world too. However, the last three seasons have been primarily angels vs. demons and that's not the show that I fell in love with. I enjoy it greatly still but I miss the hunting. I miss monsters and myths and legends being hunted down, city by city. Instead, I get angels and demons fighting over souls from purgatory, deciding who will be the next God and rule it all. Sam and Dean should stick with humans and fight the things that aren't miles above their heads with power. They need something they can kill with a shotgun. They need to be able to hide with the help of salt in the doorways. That's what made this show.
So please change it back. I will keep watching in the hope that the hunt begins again but please start changing back.
Friday, May 20, 2011
Thursday, May 19, 2011
Wednesday, May 18, 2011
On Stranger Tides tells of the legendary Jack Sparrow as he must work his way to the Fountain of Youth before the dreaded Blackbeard gets to it first. Along the way he must fight Barbossa some more, the undead and even man-eating mermaids.
I actually quite enjoyed this one. I know they made something like a bazillion dollars but I didn't know why another Pirates movie was needed. That being said, I would put this above the last two but better than one. It had quirky humor again and no annoying Legolas crying about being in love. And it had no giant toilet in the middle of the ocean. Plus, who was made more being a pirate more than Ian McShane? Penelope Cruz didn't get her words in the way of looking at her, which is always a good thing. I wanted Depp on the screen again. With 2 and 3, I got real tired of him. He was extremely played out and he needed his rest. Thankfully he got it and they did this one.
I would recommend seeing this one in theater. I didn't see it in 3D nor do I know if it will look good but there were quite a few parts that I would like to see in 3D so it may actually be worth it. Let me know if you do and if it is.
Last issue, we had out new status quo and a run in with Spider-Man. This issue we get more of that but with some of the best dialogue I have read in a while, especially from Spider-Man (cuz Amazing Spider-Man is a crap book, no matter what I keep reading online).
Paladin is the lone Hero right now and hates Spidey. Spidey hates that Paladin works for money but is willing to help out as he fights Batroc The Leaper. There wasn't a whole lot to this issue. Spidey tracks the shipment to a warehouse, Paladin shows up injured to help, they find out a bunch of crap is going on when they thought it wasn't and Spidey must now fight the new(ish) Scorpion and some dinosaurs. Your typical hero gigs. As I said, though, this issue was great because of the dialogue. Our very fist words spoken are Control (Misty Knight) to Spidey:
"Hello hero. This is Control. You're awful quiet. Everything okay?" "Shhhht! I'm being sneaky."
He then refers to himself and his following of the bad guys as Han Solo as he and The Falcon hid on the Star Destroyer.
Our very fist page of Paladin is him trying to take a taxi to the warehouse and the driver just wants to figure out which hero he is:
"Are you that Spider-Man?"
"Are you sure?"
"I think I would be."
"But you are one of those costumed hero guys?"
"So, are you Moon Knight?"
"No. He's taller. Wears white."
"Are you Power Man?"
"He's bigger. And Blacker."
"Ghost Rider then? You gotta be!"
"Does my head look like it's on fire?"
"Are you just saying names?"
By the time he finally makes it to the warehouse with Spidey, he's just in time to see him being locked in a cage with the baddies that I mentioned above. Last page is Misty Knight pulling out a gun with the cliched "If you want something done right" speech.
DnA are some of the finest writers out there, in case you haven't already figures it out. Amazing. Go check out all of their space stuff and then come check out this book. They deserve your attention and your hard-earned money.
I saw the Devil is a story of revenge. After his fiance is brutally murdered, Kim Soo-hyeon takes matters into his own hands. He is a Special Agent (we really get no further detail except that) and her father is the Chief of Police so he has a bit of an inside for this one. For 2 1/2 hours, he hunts down the killer, Kyung-chul (played by Oldboy's Min-sik Choi. If you haven't seen Oldboy, do it. It is a must), beats the bloody hell out of him and releases him so that he can hunt him again. He begins to play the game of Cat and Mouse with Kyung-chul, with both men trying to trap the other.
The very first scene of the movie is the killer murdering the fiance. She's stranded with a flat tire and he pulls up, "offering help". The help then turns into him bludgeoning her in the head with a hammer and dragging the bloody mess through the snow and into his van, where he takes here to his place to fully kill her. Very sadistically. Here's what I meant by the movie being beautiful. As he drags her to his van, we get a wide, upwards shot of her van and the bloody trail her body leaves, and snow slowly falling everywhere. The actual scene is dark and grisly and we get a gorgeous snowfall shot to offset it. This movie was filled with these. Amazing camera work throughout.
And as brutal and graphic as this movie does get, the psychological banter between murderer and avenger is great. The movie's title is perfect in that you never really get whom it refers to. It could easily be the killer referring to the man who has finally matched him and it could also be the good guy who has seen the face of the devil and fallen. I have my opinion to what it means but the great part is that it doesn't matter. The final scene is one that is actually quite haunting and brilliant. I won't give it away but it almost turns your thoughts on everything around and leaves you with a chill.
This may sound bad, but I love foreign movies for this exact reason. 8 times outta 10, I will choose an American movie to watch. However, most foreign films have the understanding that this can be and is an art form. They tend to put more meaning into their stories while we are content with shit blowing up and just being cool. Nothing wrong with that, but when I'm impressed with a foreign movie, it's usually a great impression than what an American movie leaves me with
All in all, this move was pretty messed up and I know it's not the kinda movie for everyone but you should see it. Amazing story, amazing acting and amazing quality.
Monday, May 16, 2011
You ever read the comic Chew? Chew is about Tony Chu. A detective with an awesome ability. Chu is cibopathic. That means that he can get a psychic impression from anything that he eats. Comes in handy when they need to know the history of a murder victim (oh yeah. He goes there).
This book is awesome and I highly recommend it. In this book, Detective Chu comes across Lin Sae Woo, who works for the US Department of Agriculture. She also has some unbelievably huge, comic book jiggle-jugs and I'm more than happy to let them into the club.
Sunday, May 15, 2011
Friday, May 13, 2011
The Killer Meteors (1976)
The Killer Meteor (Yu Wang) is hired by the evil Wa Wu-Bin (Chan, in a rare villain role) to steal an antidote from his more evil wife. She has been poisoning him for many years as a power play and Wu-Bin has had enough. Before getting to her, though, Killer Meteor must make his way through her four bodyguards and her deadly weapon that melts people into puddles (though, all they actually do is dress a kid up to look like they have shrunk and then show the clothing with goo sticking out).
This is not really the best movie to showcase Chan. He has a ten minute scene, thirty minutes into the movie and then a final fight towards the end where he battles Meteor. Everything else is Killer Meteor running around. This movie actually had a lot of unnecessary "twists" just to try and throw people off the trail. At one point, Chan is also poisoned and melts into nothing, only to return 10 minutes later. It was all a ruse and he is tricky like that. The movie is old enough that you almost have to forgive how cheesy and bad it is but it's my kinda bad. I love bad dubbing (an essential for any Chan movie) and I love fighting so it goes perfect. Fun to watch if you're a fan of these types of movies but not much of you're just a Chan Fan.
Up Next: Shinjuku Incident
Thursday, May 12, 2011
Wednesday, May 11, 2011
We started DC's next big event in the pages of Flash this week. With the return of Professor Zoom, we are getting Flashpoint. A DC universe that we have never seen before.
Barry Allen is suddenly in a world he doesn't know. His mother is alive, he and Iris were never together and, worst of all, he's not the Flash. In the midst of all this, we are introduced to out new batch of heroes. Batman is chasing down a chick named Yo-Yo, looking for the Joker who has apparently kidnapped Judge Dent's twin daughters. When she doesn't give him any answers he likes, he simply throws her off the roof to die. However, Cyborg saves her at the last minute and turns her over to the cops. He begins to ask Batman for his help. Emperor Aquaman killed over one hundred million people when he sank Eastern Europe. Wonder Woman and the Amazons killed over thirty-two million when they took the United Kingdom as their New Themyscira. If they can't all join forces to stop them, they will both destroy the world as they fight for it. Everyone is ready to join up until the famed Batman says no, at which point they feel it will fail without him and back out, leaving Cyborg all by his lonesome (which is apparently a consistent in any DC Universe). Meanwhile, Barry knows where he can find answers and that's also with Batman. As he arrives at Wayne Manor, he walks through the house seeing nobody. He makes his way down to the Batcave, looking for him. As Batman doesn't like to be found, he attacks Barry. As He starts calling Batman Bruce, he stops. Looking confused Batman says "Bruce is dead. I watched him die." leaving us with a final page of Barry figuring out that this Batman is actually Thomas Wayne.
We're kind of just thrust into this world. We know that Reverse Flash is causing this to happen, but we don't know how yet. Instead, we just have a semi-cliched story: Hero awakes in a world that completely different and nobody knows who he is. Very basic and broad but what makes this one work already are the changes themselves. I love that Aquaman and Wonder Woman are are war, trying to take over the world. I love that Batman kills those that don't help him. And I love that it looks like it was Martha and Bruce who were killed, leaving Thomas to become the Batman. As I said, the premise is pretty old and used but when you throw a great writer like Geoff Johns onto it, it takes a whole new turn and hopefully it will be for the better.
Monday, May 9, 2011
Fast Five tells of the "old gang" coming back for one last ride. Running from the law, Dom, his sister Mia and ex-cop Brian run through the streets of Rio from The Rock and his badass crew of badasses.
This is one of those movies where (in case the trailers didn't already tell ya this) a lot of action happens and that's all you have. And all you need. Fast car chases, awesome fighting and hot women. It really is the cliched guy-flick and I enjoyed it.
Not part of the movie, one of the best moments in my movie life came from a little kid. As Dom is yelling at one of the crew "Get Out!". After that line, there is a stare-down between everyone and at that silent moment, some little kid maybe two rows back yells "Get Out!". I was kinda sold at that point. Even this little kid got the simplicity of it all but also got that it's fun. You can certainly wait for dvd on this one but I would actually recommend getting it in the theaters if ya get the chance. No rush though.
Sunday, May 8, 2011
Which leads me to today. As I worked all afternoon long to a lot of busy movies and customers. And missing game four of the series. In which the Lakers were killed. I missed watching my least favorite team and two-time defending champs, being knocked out. All for work. I love my job but sometimes I hate it too. Oh well. I still have the satisfaction of knowing they will not win again, right?
Friday, May 6, 2011
The Lady Sif may not have played a major role in Thor but I was on her every time she was on screen. Other than one episode of Sunny in Philadelphia, I had never seen her before this movie and that's a shame. She's a nice 5'9" and looks to be single. I may have to rush her invitation over to her...
Thursday, May 5, 2011
Uncanny X-Force #9
Man do I love me some Remender X-Force. In this stand alone issue, Magneto shows up at the headquarters of Force with a picture of a Nazi and a request for Wolverine
"Why can't you do it"
"Because I'm asking you to do it."
Fantomex gives Logan the use of EVA as he grabs his samurai sword and heads to Rio De Janeiro. In a secluded cottage in the middle of the jungle, he comes across an old man who tells him the full truth: after the war he ran from that life. He met a lovely lady whom he married and lived a long life with until she dies, never knowing the real monster he once was. He knew this day would come. As Wolverine raises the sword, the old man gives him one final goodbye,
"No man outruns his past. I hope you will try and remember that... When your victims come for you."
We're left with Wolverine cleaning blood from his sword and blood-splettered photo of the old man and his wife.
I've ranted about this book before and it still blows me away. Remender is brilliant on this book and you should read it.
Thor tells the story of the God of Thunder as he is stripped of his powers and cast out of Asgard to Earth. I'm assuming most everyone who knows of my blog are probably a comic geeks so we will skip the drag-ons.
This movie was amazing. Plain and simple. I admit to being pretty stoked for this movie for some time so there could be a bias there but this movie blew me away. I dare say that this may be the best Marvel movie since X2 or Spider-Man. Chris Hemsworth was great as the Odinson. A lot of us were thinking crazy things when they announced him being cast and a lot of us are wrong. Easily the best actor in the movie for me. As newsarama put it,
"It would have been easy to play an arrogant god as a one-note caricature rather than a fleshed-out character, but the key to pulling it off is Hemsworth’s (and the screenwriter’s) decision to have Thor really enjoy being Thor."
You believe this is Thor. This is exactly how he would look and act and just be if he were really in front of us. The same writer said that he found Hemsworth to be a "truer" Thor than Downey Jr was as Iron Man. Little tough for me to agree with but damned if I wouldn't put him at the top of a list with him.
And Tom Hiddleston was amazing as Loki. The subtlety of his performance was brilliant. His ability to have such a convincing demeanor and yet show the audience in his face how full of shit he really is. You believe what he says even though you know you shouldn't.
I honestly can't say enough about this movie. I loved it. Go see it. Maybe skip the 3D but if you don't see it eventually, you are stupid and probably read comics by Gail Simone.
Wednesday, May 4, 2011
Dylan Dog to me was a like Bubba Ho-Tep: Not really a good movie but ya still enjoy the hell out of it. Dylan had bad acting and silly plot-threads. Routh, though a dreamboat, is easily the worst part of the movie and Sam Huntington was the main thread that saved it all. And (trying not to ruin the ending just in case...) the big battle at the end was extremely anti-climactic. Here's my main example of this movie. Dylan goes to Taye Diggs (a vampire) looking for answers. He opens the blinds on a wall, then opens the bedroom door across from them. As Diggs scrambles up in bed, burning from the light, Dylan continually steps in front of the light and back out as a torture method to get answers. No only do the hands of Diggs not burn when he tries to cover his face (small but stupid), but he's not smart enough to realize that HE'S IN BED AND HAS SHEETS HE CAN PULL OVER HIMSELF! Little tiffs like that were throughout the movie.
That being said, I come back to my original statement. This movie was pretty fun. You will not love this movie. You may even hate it. But this was pure fun for me and we need these movies around too. Wait for a cheap rental but I say you should see it eventually.
Tuesday, May 3, 2011
Lady Brewster may be best known for her role as Vin Diesel's sister in the Fast and Furious movies. Even though I have only seen the first one (and it wasn't all that good), the fifth one opened up this last weekend to huge masses. Going with this, she also appears on the cover of the new issue of Maxim Magazine. She's hot and she's hot and I don't care about her acting. You know the secret knock to the club house, Miss Brewster. I'll see you there.
Monday, May 2, 2011
"According to The Telegraph in Australia, the 17-year-old singer and a bodyguard left their seats in business class to chat with members of his entourage in coach as the plane readied for a flight from Sydney to Melbourne. The seatbelt sign was switched on at the time.
The cabin crew reportedly ordered the pair back to their seats, with Australia's SkyNews reporting that a flight attendant told Bieber that his behavior "was a security risk and that he had been acting like a child and would therefore be treated like one." "