How I Stole From Adam Chapter Four: Red Eye

My how the time flies. I can't believe I'm already up to number four. Number four! I'm rather impressed with myself.
By the time I finished Red Eye, my first thought was "Why was this called Red Eye? Nothing happened until they were on the ground". The trailers all lead me to believe in was a "panic in the sky" kinda movie but I was mistaken. And on top of everything (and I hope this doesn't ruin anything), it wasn't even Rachel McAdams who stopped The Scarecrow. William Striker did. McAdams actually didn't do much of anything. She got smacked around a bit. Stabbed Scarecrow in the throat. Fell down a lot while running. And then William Striker came in and shot him. After McAdams' bullet had no effect on him. But whatever. I'm in love with Rachel McAdams and the movie was only a buck-fifteen long so over-all it was decent. Definitely worth the two months I've had it from Netflix.

I Knew I Was Right...

Check out what I just read online. And if it's online, it must be true:

Hollywood is healthy!

There's a study to prove it:

"A rather bizarre study carried out by German researchers suggests that staring at women's breasts is good for men's health and increases their life expectancy.

"According to Dr. Karen Weatherby, a gerontologist and author of the study, gawking at women’s breasts is a healthy practice, almost at par with an intense exercise regime, that prolongs the lifespan of a man by five years.

"She added, 'Just 10 minutes of staring at the charms of a well-endowed female, is roughly equivalent to a 30-minute aerobics work-out.'"

5 Comics You Should Read (Or Re-Read, If Be The Case)

One of the great things about Con is all the retailers who bring shit to get rid of. You can carry away some great swag if you can find it first. Toys, statues, cards and comics. They don't wanna drag it all back so it can get good and cheap. I was able to pick up some great trades, which made me decide to tell you of these five that you should definitely try if you get the chance. In No order:

Pride of Baghdad - Brian K Vaughn is probably one of the most talented writers in comics right now. His 60-issue series Y: The Last Man was absolutely brilliant and a must read. His Ex Machina series, though extremely late, may have to be thrown onto that list as well once it's all said and done. But this one quickly fell off the grid after it's initial release. Pride is about a pride of lions that "escape" the zoo in Baghdad after a bombing rips the place down. Now all they want to do is find the real home again and join the wild, all while having to survive the war zone. Great story. It's actually derived from a true story and with content like this, it does tend to get a little political (sorta) so it may not be every one's favorite but I've loved it more and more every time I read it.

Astro City - This one may the tough one to get behind. It's been going for some number of years and it's scheduling is pretty off. However, after the ongoing series ended, there have only been minis or one-shots so it's fairly easy to find collections. Astro City is a city filled with super-powered beings, like most other comics. However, what makes this one stand out is the writing of Kurt Busiek. Busiek is able to bring us super-beings that are more human than most any other comics out there. Their joys, their angst, their problems and sadness and anger. He makes you connect to this characters because you can see yourself in them which is the one thing every writer strives for. And Alex Ross is on board for covers so there's no going wrong there.

Cla$$war - You have probably never heard of the comic company Com.x and in all likely hood, this will not change. However, Cla$$war could be the one thing that changes this. Cla$$war tells the story of the governments super-human team, the Enola Gay, and how politics really do run everything. When the leader of Enola Gay, The American, finds out just how they have been used by their government, he sets out to make sure everyone knows just what the truth is. I'm a guy who hates politics, but this "political thriller" blew me away. Hard hitting action and slick writing make this a huge standout from the typical hero stuff.

Torso - Before Brian Michael Bendis became the Golden Child for Marvel, he worked on small, black and white books at Image where he also drew. Top of that list is Torso. Based on the real events of the "Torso Murderer" from the '30s, we follow Elliot Ness as he tries to find the killer before it is too late. This is a great crime story and it shows that Bendis can do mush more than write the Avengers and Spider-Man. And on top of everything, this is another comic that Hollywood is trying to turn into a movie and last I head, Bendis was writing the screenplay for it. Jump on this one before it becomes the next fad and you are forced to start hating it.

Midnight Nation - J. Michael Straczynski is absolutely one of the top writers in the industry and this one proves it. Detective David Grey is thrust into a world "in-between" and is forced to fight for his very soul. He must go on a journey with Laurel, a lady who acts as guide to all who are in David's position, to New York (from LA, on foot) over the course of a year. If he can make it there, he can get his soul back. If he not, he will eventually turn into a mindless creature, forever roaming the In-Between. This is one of my favorites of all time. I picked up the trade at Con just so I would stop reading the single issues and stop wearing them down. I really can't say enough about this book. May be some of the best character writing that I have come across. This is the single reason that I will always give Straczynski's books a shot each and every time. Pick this book up.

Try This Album

I know I don't have the greatest or widest variety when it come to music, but thanks to my long driving adventures this last week, my brother had me listen to the newest CD from Nonpoint, Miracle. Now, I have some of their previous albums and as much as I like some of the songs, they've always been one of the ones where you listen to your favorite tracks while skipping the rest. However, this album changes that view for me completely. I love this CD and I have not been able to stop listening to it ever since. I know it probably won't be every one's new favorite or anything but here's one of my favorites from it. Think what you will for I shall do the same.

My Con-clusion

I'm actually not trying to brag this time when I tell you that this was an amazing Con. I really don't know how another Con will compare. I went from meeting and getting a sketch of Doc Seismic from Ryan Ottley (of Invincible which you should be reading if you are not) to watching Ryan Reynolds give his Lantern ring to a 10-year-old (in what may be one of the single coolest and classiest things I've seen). From turning around right into Black Scrubs to being 5 or 6 rows in front of that guy who was stabbed in the eye (which was pretty fucking crazy. And I don't mind cursing because it was absolutely crazy). I was there for the Chris-es at the Cap and Thor panel as well as the surprise introduction of the entire Avengers line-up (including new Bruce Banner Mark Ruffalo). I was there when Hit-Girl told us her mom won't let her watch R-rated movies and I was there for Harrison Ford's first Con appearance ever. And I was certainly there for this picture of the best sandwich ever.
Awesome, awesome time and I am super glad I somehow choose this year to go again. But it's a little out of hand it seems and I'm also glad I don't do it every year. It felt a little like it's the new mall. Like "It's that time of the year. Guess we'll go hang out at Con". But I digress. Great time and I am sorry you guys couldn't go with me. Maybe we can all plan for it the next time.

S**t You Don't Know - 7

As I sit here, running through all the things that I will probably forget to pack with me when I leave for Con in the morning (yes, that is bragging), I feel the need to leave you with one more bit of useless information. I am still a technology caveman so as much as I would like to, I will probably not have a way to post anything while gone so I bid you a nice week with s**t you don't know volume 7:
In 1999 a 52-year-old woman in Hong Kong turned the body of her deceased husband over to the authorities. She said that she had held on to the body for a week in the hope that he would revive, but eventually gave in to the smell.

Parents Need To Shut Up

Alright, so I get home from work and find my computer still on. As I go to turn it off, I decide to check if I missed anything worth reading while at work and I boy did I. I read this rant from some lady. There's a spot above the main picture to scroll to the next page. You'll have to go through them all to get her full letter.
Angry Mom
Now I have my retort: Then don't go to the f-ing movies! First, if your theater only offered it in 3D, then your theater is a crap hole of a place and you shouldn't be going there anyway. But if all you are gonna do is complain about the pricing, then walk out. It's really that simple. Nobody is forcing you to pay for a ticket. You can leave if you are unhappy with paying that price. What you don't get to do is pay it and them bitch and moan about it later. It was your choice. To go there; to pay the price; to sit through it. All you're choice.
And you claim Despicable Me wasn't your first disappointment either. That makes you stupid. If you are unhappy with something a first time, don't try it a second time. Or a third or a fourth. You wanna stop using water? Get a fan. You went to the movies for the same reason all mothers do: to get your kids to stop bothering you. And it has nothing to do with your parenting skills. It's simply an easy tool that parents have found to get theirs kids to stop running around like idiots and making noise. It's the same with a television set. You don't get to use the movies to your advantage and then complain about it. You can't have it both ways.
And your budgeting skills are for crap. You claim to have saved money for upwards of six months in case you need it and yet $43 made you have to not buy groceries. That probably should have been thought through before you agreed on paying for the movie tickets. And taking food off the table for your family because you decided to see a movie? That one does make you a bad parent.
And ya wanna know why 3D pricing is so high? Because of the price each theater corporation has to pay in order to get one digital projector that is capable of showing a 3D movie. Now those are ridiculous prices. So not only do you pay the extraordinary high price for a regular movie, but a surcharge is added to pay off that machine as well. The pricing all stems from the ladder of greed that all successful businesses are made from. Not to mention that Despicable Me was made for around $70 million. Guess how they get their money back.
Nobody likes movie ticket prices. Nobody. 3D or otherwise. They are too expensive and it is ridiculous. I absolutely agree with that. You wanna know what else is ridiculous? Watching Harry Potter when you could teach your kids to read it instead. Trust me, it's a better story anyway. Putting a movie out in 3D is absolutely a gimmick. But it's no less a gimmick then putting one out in 2D. It's all a way to take your money for a product of entertainment. If you don't like the price to pay for that product, then don't. Walk away. It really is that simple.

Lantern Revealed

Got us our first look at the CG'ed Green Lantern costume. What we think?

My VULGAR Review of Inception

I am trying to make sure with that title that everyone knows that my review of Inception will be using some harsh language, as well as some adult themes and comparisons. I am saying all of this ahead of time so that nobody is surprised or offended when they begin to read such vulgarities in this review. And in case you couldn't tell, I am running this on for the same purposes; so that such things are not read for a while, thus making it very clear that when you do read them., you are willing and able. Are ya ready? Good. Cuz Inception mind-fucked me for 2 1/2 hours.

There is really no other way to put it. My mind was grabbed by Christopher Nolan, and he repeatedly thrusted his movie in and out of my head for two hours and twenty-eight minutes. And I enjoyed every minute of it. I think. I have not felt this way about a movie since the first Matrix. By movie's end, I'm pretty sure I understood everything that they were telling me, but I am completely in awe at it's concept and presentation. I found this movie to be amazing.

Inception is the story of some guys (DiCaprio and Gordan-Levitt and others) who enter one's Dream-Scape and steal information. They are then hired by Ken Wantanabe to try and plant a memory, a concept coincidentally called inception. The next two hours is this team of "dream rovers" coming up with the elaborate task of how to plant a memory into someone's head while making them think it was their idea the whole time (which if you can't do, they know that somebody else told them to think it. Example: Don't look down. What do you now do? You look down. But you know the idea of looking down wasn't yours). In order to do this, they come up with the mind-fucking idea of opening up a dream within a dream within a dream. Which is about when Nolan starts taking his pants down to start thrusting.

I cannot wait to watch this movie again if for nothing else than to just make sure I did understand it. But my initial reaction is to say that I was blown away by this movie. For me, this movie once again proves why (not counting The Prestige) Nolan is a master story-teller. Go see this movie. But bring some kind of protection in just in case Nolan doesn't pull out fast enough for ya.

S**t You Don't Know - 6

Hans Christian Anderson, Danish author of children's fairy tale classics including The Steadfast Tin Soldier and The Ugly Duckling, was hypochondriac, dyslexic and highly effeminate. He was also phobic about arriving late, which caused him to turn up at railway stations hours early. He always carried a coil rope with him for fear of being caught in a hotel room fire, and compulsively returned to a room he had left twice to check that the candles were out. He also never ate pork for fear of catching tapeworm.

Darn You Nicolas Cage!

With Sorcerer's Apprentice opening tomorrow, I was able to preview it last night and I was thoroughly impressed. It looked fairly good from the trailers so I was more than happy to try it out.

Apprentice is the story of ancient magicians (Nicloas Cage, Alfred Molina and Monica Bellucci) who were taught by Merlin himself. After Horvath(Molina) turns and helps the evil witch Morgan Le Fay kill Merlin (and something happens to Bellucci. Sorry. Missed that part), Merlin passes his ring to Balthazar(Cage) and says it will the one true Merlinian (ancestor of Merlin?) who will help save the world. Cut to the future, Balthazar is able to find the 10-year-old Merlinian and give him the ring before he and Horvath get imprisoned in a vase for the next 10-years, thus giving young kid time to grow up into Jay Baruchel. Meeting Balthazar again, he is then taught magic in order to stop Horvath from releasing Margana again and ending the world.

This movie was actually a lot of fun. It's Disney and it's PG so it has some cheese and bad dialogue but it was a lot of fun. And sadly, Cage was pretty good. I actually thought he was better than Jay Baruchel (though that's not the hardest task to accomplish). And there can never be enough said about Alfred Molina. This guy is great in everything he does and he was easily the best part of this movie too. There was even a pretty funny scene where Baruchel imitates Indiana Jones, testing our knowledge of obscure, small acting gigs. Overall, I would recommend this movie. You should have a lot of fun and if you go with kids, you should have fun seeing how much fun they are having.

S**t You Don't Know - 5

In 1998 E. Frenkel, one of Russia's growing number of psychic healers, claimed to have successfully used his mental powers to stop moving vehicles, including a streetcar. When Frenkel decided he was ready for something bigger he stepped in front of a freight train. Frenkel died from his injuries in Astrakhan on an undisclosed date.

S**t You Don't Know - 4

Calvin Cooledge (US president from 1923 to 1929) allegedly loved to eat breakfast in Bed while having his head rubbed with Vaseline.

S**t You Don't Know - 3

In Hong Kong 32-year-old self-proclaimed "knight of God" Syed Atta Muhammad was committed to a secure unit after he assaulted a young female tour guide. He explained that her breasts were too big to serve God because they made her look like a prostitute.

To Catch a Predator

But not of the child porn kind. I watched Predators this week and I totally forgot to tell everyone to go see it. It was awesome. Definitely reminiscent of the first one which, let's be honest, is really the only good one. The movie begins with Adrien Brody (surprisingly good at this action stuff) waking up in free fall and crashing in some jungle. He is quickly joined by others and the hunt is one. Hope I'm not ruining it for anyone, but the survivors are then picked off one by one for about two hours. And I loved it. If you're a fan of the first Predator, you need to see this one. It almost makes you forget about Danny Glover and AvP (sadly, I really enjoyed AvP Requiem so I won't bring that one into the mix).

S**t You Don't Know - 2

In 1986 an entire jury pool of 86 people, assembled for a criminal trial in Centerville, Tennessee, had to be dismissed because too many members of the jury were related to each other.

Check This Dude Out

I first saw this guys art in Marvel's Immortal Weapons #5. His name is Arturo Lozzi and he's amazing. He actually has a blogspot page so I would recommend checking it out. His older stuff looks cool, but his new, super-hero stuff is amazing! I'm only putting this one picture up because I don't wanna maybe take stuff that I can get in trouble for because I don't know how this all works still. But type in his name and go there!

S**t You Don't Know - 1

In 1863 the author Louisa May Alcott fell ill, and described in her journal how she suffered from terrible hallucinations, in which she was repeatedly molested by a big Spaniard with soft hands. She recovered and went on to write Little Women

A Sad Moment.

This morning I had my quarterly, diabetes check up and I had the worst 16 year-old moment ever. As with all the others, it starts out with a weigh-in and while it said I had lost eight pounds since the last time (though, the last time said that I had gained eight pounds...) my first thought was "It must all be from my ass cuz my boobs and gut still look the same". And that was when a little bit of me died. I can't believe that was the first thing to pop into my mind. I'm really just one step away from sparkling in the sun and constantly flipping my hair out from my eye-line.

How I Stole From Adam Chapter Three: Road House

My boss Debi gave me her extra copy of Road House the other day and I decided to finally watch it. Road House is the story of this lovely lady who is brought in to help clean up a bar and get rid of the scum and villainy that have taken it over. The lady-bouncer, Dalton (played by Patrick Swayze, though I think they got her name wrong cuz I do believe I have heard of her before and it's Patricia Swayze. Probably one of them movie pseudonyms though), has a long reputation of being a bad mother (figuratively, since we never see her with any kids). She quickly takes over the reigns of the Double Deuce, ridding it of the trash that actually works there and moving on to those who patron. While there, however, she finds out that a rich and evil man pretty much runs the entire town and he is now after her for ruining his "business". But things only get worse when she actually starts dating the lady that the rich man likes and that doesn't sit well either. The rich man sends every thug and hillbilly he can find after her but she just keeps kicking all their asses, some with the help of her old friend played by Sam Elliot (yes, the Sam Elliot). Can she somehow save the town from this tyranny and save the relationship with the lovely lady?....

Yes.

I was actually quite surprised by this movie. First, it was actually a pretty hard R rating with violence, language and nudity which completely threw me off guard. But mostly I was surprised that I really liked it. It's one of those "manly man" kinda movies and I didn't think it would be possible. Swayze actually ripped out some dudes throat at one point. His throat! And I approve. I would say that if you haven't seen it, you should give it a shot. I never knew a chick could kick this much ass, especially Patricia Swayze.

?

I guess I'm just too nice of a guy because I'm taking my friend
Lisa to see Eclipse this afternoon before work. My second time.....
Wish me luck.
(Yes Mr. Lautner, I too am sad)

Twi-Tards Piss Me Off

So, work has been a bit crazy this week. 14 sold out theaters for the midnight premiere of Eclipse plus two theaters for a 3 am show. And with Airbender having a midnight the very next day, I watched it at about 3 in the morning, during that Eclipse. Not some good sleep being had. Then I worked the Wednesday midnight of Airbender (hello again my Comic Sirens) followed by a 2-10:30 shift today and I keep working through the next week. 9 strait days. Not that it's "killing" me or anything, but it's nice to have a day off. But, I mostly wanted to share my feelings on these two movies so...
Eclipse wasn't crap. Much. I don't like the Twilight crap. I was never a big fan of vampires but I'm even less a fan of gay vampires that sparkle in sun and argue over emo girls who don't have anything about them worth arguing over. The first two movies were crap about vampires and werewolves loving them same women. Boo hoo. However, this third one actually had some action in it and it wasn't as bad as the other. Sadly, I kinda enjoyed it. Until Edward (gay vampire) and Jacob (gay werewolf but with a lot of good looking muscles...) start bonding. While Jacob is keeping Bella (gay girl they both love) warm. With no shirt on. In a tent. In the snow. While Edward watches. Whom she is engaged to. While this is going on, they start talking about how they actually appreciate the other one for always trying to keep her safe. "Hey man, thanks for cuddling with my girl with your shirt off in order to keep her warm. Wanna go to Chuck E Cheese after this?". Stupid. But sadly an ok movie.
Now comes the hard part. The Last Airbenders. Now, I will say that I am a huge fan of the cartoon and that I actually liked this movie. However, I do find it a disappointment. It wasn't as good as I was hoping for and it definitely wasn't as good as it should have been. In case you aren't familiar to the tv show, Avatar: the Last Airbender is the story of a land where the Four Nations (of the elements air, water, earth and fire) rule. Some people are able to control these elements (or "bend" them) and one person (the Avatar) is able to control them all, bringing peace and balance to the Four Nations. However, for the last hundred years, the Avatar has been missing, leaving the Fire Nation capable of taking most everything over. After finding the 12 year-old boy who is the Avatar, two others are determined to help him master the elements and bring back said peace and balance. For a Nickelodeon cartoon, is rather amazing. And now the movie.
First, they apparently went through a dialect expert who said the names are pronounced wrongly in the cartoon, so they are different in the movie. But oh well. I can live with that. And most of the cast has little experience, with Sokka (one of the ones who find Aang the Avatar) being arguably the biggest only because he is Jasper from the Twilight movies. However, Dev Patel plays the villainous Zuko and with his role in Slumdog Millionaire, he could also be the most famous name. But I can live with the lack of experience. What Took away from it for me was the pacing of the story. With the movie being the first season and that being roughly 8-9 hours long, I expected a lot to be cut. However, instead of trying to rewrite the story to fit the hour 40 movie, they seemed to just film the first two, the middle two and the last two episodes, with the characters explaining abundantly what should have been happening in between. And it made for an all to often jumpy and scratchy time. I still enjoyed it, but I can't help but feel cheated out of what could have and should have been an amazing experience.