Wednesday, May 30, 2012

NB of the Week

Speed Round!
(As always, Spoils follow!)

The Ultimates #11
Reed Richards is a better villain than hero. Plain and simple. The White House has been attacked and Fury and his men have all be rounded up as Weapons of Mass Destruction under the Winter Protocol. Thor and Iron Man try to get help from the President but instead he turns Tony over to Reed. Something tells me this is part of the plan... Just a hunch.
FF #18
Johnny is all that's left to teach the young'ins in class today but when love and reproduction come up, he takes the kids on a field trip back to his "kingdom" in the Negative Zone. Only things are a little crazy there. There are uprisings and revolts and Johnny has to deal with that now. Turns out its very simple though: they only want him to promise them free elections. Easy. Any of the three others under Johnny's rule would do a great job. Except he forgot about the write-in vote. Sadly, Annihilus just beat out the closest candidate by 14,980,336,834,233 votes.

Powers #10
Somebody has been killing the Golden Ones (Gods on Earth). But who in the hell can kill a God? Turns out a scientist named Dillon Trumbler can with the help of the Powers Virus (pretty mush an STD that gives people super powers while killing their bodies). It also turns out that the Golden Ones are very, very bad people and kinda deserved what Dillon did. I won't go into details but after both he and his wife were "unwilling seduced" and left for dead, he wanted payback. Only now the higher up Gods have been defied by man and a wrath is on the move.
Did I mention that after issue #11 the series is relaunching again? I'm sure the mad Gods don't have much play in that.

Supercrooks #3
To help the gambling debts of a friend, Johnny Bolt has gathered a team of villains to help rob one of the world's worst villains. Everybody wins that way, right? Not so much. After sending in his ex, she heads off (her job done) and he and the rest go after the goods. Only The Bastard (yeah, that's the big baddies mantle) hasn't lost his touch with age. As Bolt and the others head into his mansion, Bastard stops by the airport to have a word with the pretty lady. One issue left and I can guarantee we haven't seen the last piece of blood and mayhem in this title.

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles #10
How sweet is this book? Turns out the turtles and Splinter were created to part of General Krang's army which was made in order to fight Shredder and the Foot Clan, both of whom want nothing more than power and control. Splinter is made to fight so that he can be tested and brought into the Foot but when he declines to kill his opponent, Shredder and he finally realize that they have known each other for far too long. Both have been reincarnated (as have the turtles) and are meant to kill one another once more. My money is on the rat.

Saturday, May 26, 2012

Boobs of the Day

In a first for BotD, I actually came across this little pot of gold while searching for another lady entirely. Apparently her name is Gemma Atkinson and in a very male decision, I stopped looking at that point. Don't need much else to get invited into my club.

Friday, May 25, 2012

To You Truck People...

You suck. Plain and simple. Unless you live in the mountains or you are a framer who needs to lug a lot of shit everywhere, you only have a truck to try and look cool. "If you're a real man, you drive a truck", right? Well I've got news for ya: mostly it just makes you an asshole You don't care about anybody else on the road because you're ass is safe should you run somebody over. You use it as a status of where and who you want to be in life when all it's really saying it that you're a little man who can't make actually his way to those places.
"But Clifton, I drive a truck and I don't think I'm an asshole..."
Too bad. That's like saying I'm not pretentious but I listen to Bill O'Reilly. Sometimes things get socially lumped together and that's the risk you take when you get a truck.
So screw you truck drivers. Good luck on the roads when I finally get that tank I've always wanted.

Wednesday, May 23, 2012

NB of the Week

Aquaman #9 - The Others: Chapter Three
Black Manta is gunning for The Others; a group of powered beings that Aquaman was once a part of. But why now? How are they connected? As Aquaman and Ya'Wara (on of The Others) hunt Black Manta, Black Manta hunts The Prisoner (another Other) and Mera interrogates Shin to find out more of the past between Arthur and him. All three stories collide at the end as Manta, in chasing Prisoner, comes faced to face with Aquaman and we get their new history: Arthur's father died of a heartache while fighting Manta and Arthur killed Manta's father in revenge.
If you are a Johns fan, you should be reading this book. Johns is well on his way to making Aquaman another Green Lantern (and in case you don't remember, Hal Jordan was a mediocre character and book, at best before Johns). It's fast and smart and brings him out into a light that he doesn't usually get to shine in. Mix in with it the amazing art of Ivan Reis and you have gold. These two are brilliant apart and even more brilliant together. Easily one of the top books you should be reading from the New DC titles.

Saturday, May 19, 2012

Guilty Pleasure #3

The Spice Girls
There is plenty here that I should be ashamed of but I can't help but smile when the music of the Spice Girls comes to mind. I don't remember when exactly I became a fan. More than likely I saw the video for Wannabe and fell for 'em all. I still own their first two albums (two of many albums I probably should get rid of but can) and still feel that little piece of happiness when I see them. Yes they were a fad. They found their corner of Girl Power and made a huge name for themselves from it. Toys, a movie, bags of chips, packaged photos, magazines, Pepsi, perfume, clothing, video games. They did it all and more importantly they sold it all. They had the attention of everybody and I just couldn't help myself. I had a thing for Scary Spice (Mel B, if I remember their names correctly and I sadly think I do) but now-a-days she has a baby with Eddy Murphy and that's kind of a deal breaker.
And to be honest, I had a semi-difficult time deciding which music video to put here. Not sure why I chose this one but ah well. Just as good as the others.
Enjoy as I did/am/will.

Friday, May 18, 2012

Trailer Watch

Not much more to say other than yeah, this is out there.....
(I should probably warn ya that this may not be the most appropriate thing so watch at your own peril)

Thursday, May 17, 2012

Cover Showcase

JSA #58
During Geoff Johns' amazing run into the Justice Society, we had the story Black Reign (which crossed over with Johns' Hawkman) in which Black Adam went in to his home country of Khandaq, killed it's dictator and took back what was his to rule and protect.
Each cover to this story was beautifully done by John Watson with JSA #58 being the big standout. To convey true emotion in a drawing is difficult. Sure you can tell us what is being felt easily. A smile is happy. Some tears usually means sadness. But to make us feel the emotion is much harder. With this cover, we know what torment Atom Smasher is feeling. In the story, he has left the JSA in order to join Black Adam and make sure real justice is handed out only to find what they are doing to be close to that which he is fighting. None of which even needs to be known in order to know his pain. Throw in that you can get that while he's still mostly masked is an even harder accomplishment. All praise to Watson. I have no idea what he's doing now but I'm more than willing to find out (probably an easy enough task...).

Wednesday, May 16, 2012

NB of the Week

Saga #3
This series is turning into a no brainer. Brian K. Vaughan is easily at the top of his game again and you will be very sad if you don't read this.
At the end of issue 2, Marko (the horned male) was shot down and a group of mutilated ghosts of kids have appeared.
As the other ghosts begin to walk away from the scared and demanding Alana (the winged mother) gets feisty, one ghost stays. Her name is Izabel, she's a mouthy teen who walked on a land mine and now has her lower half missing and intestines hanging out. Alana needs snow to help with a healing potion to save Marko's life and Izabel may be their only hope but she wants something in return. Sh wants off this planet along with Alana and Marko. Only problem is that she's bonded to the place and the only way off is to be bonded with a living native. Considering the war has killed all natives, that rests on the newest member: baby Hazel. Needing to save Marko and having no other way of finding the snow, Alana allows Izabel to bond with Hazel and we get ourselves a severed torso teenage ghost girl into the mix.
Meanwhile, Prince Robot IV is still looking for answers as to why Alana helped Marko escape prison. Not much headway with this issue but we're definitely getting a feel for where he's going. Along with him, we get The Stalker (do ya know The Stalker? Crazy bounty hunter chick that is half spider, half naked and completely scares me) as she is being chased by wild animals. She calls The Will (the guy who has the Lying Cat) for help but he wants nothing to do with her right now.
"Oh, fuck you, you self-righteous piece of... bald!"
To which we get a simple, male response,
Back to out main crew, Alana is telling a fading-fast Marko how everything is gonna be alright. In his jumbled and incoherent words, we get out final conversation between he and Alana:
"please tell my bride I loved her..."
"Marko? Marko, I'm right here."
"please tell Gwendolyn I loved her so much..."
"Who the fuck is Gwendolyn?"
And with that, we get a surprised looking Alana and Izabel and a reminder that we have to wait another month for more genius.
I'm trying to think of another series that had me this captivated by it's third issue. Uncanny X-Force is great but it was a different great. Hell, even Vaughan's Ex and Y (odd titles to put together now that I see it...) didn't blow me away this much. Vaughan has me loving every character in this book. Each one, even the bad guys. If this beginning is any indication, I'm gonna fall madly in love with this series, propose to it (in a friendly state like New York, of course), adopt a few kids from corners of the world and die in it's arms after we grow old. It's that damn good already.

Monday, May 14, 2012

Let's Get It Out There

After a smaller debate with a fellow geek, I have made my mind up with regards to a simple feeling:
I definitely don't like Venom.
He's not a good character. Even when other characters are the host to the symbiote, he's not a good character. It's not that he doesn't have the ability to be cool. He does. The problem is that he's been ground into characterizing paste and so far nothing can build him back up.
First and foremost, Venom is a product of the 90s. Any fan of comics knows how bad the 90s got for the industry. Mass flooding of issues. Style over substance. Gimmicks over tactics. One selling concept was found and everybody tried to replicate it and that very much included Venom. Venom was new. Venom was dark and gritty and different. He was an archetype for the 90s in that all you had to do was take a hero, darken their colors, reverse their powers or abilities and there ya have their new enemy. And that worked. For a time. Spawn started that death.
Todd McFarlane (along with most the guys who started Image... Well, primarily he and Liefeld) created the ultra popular Spawn, who was as close to a Venom character as you can get without being sued. And it sold a ridiculous amount. Well, Marvel won't be out done by that. They created Carnage who came out a month apart from Spawn. And continued with six other symbiote characters within the year. To date, fifteen different characters have been created and seven different hosts to the original Venom have been swapped in and out (including Peter Parker and Eddie Brock). Male and female. Good and bad and good again. And as with most ideas from the 90s, he was thrown in our faces and was quickly cut down to size. Eddie Brock was given mini after mini. A few ongoing series that never went for long but he was always kept around. Yet nobody at Marvel was willing to change him. His fanbase was still steady and they didn't want to piss off the fanboys by changing their beloved character. 19 mini series. 2 ongoings (one of which is currently still going). Something has to change.
The current series is trying to be different. Flash Thompson is the host and he's trying to use it for good (again) while working for the government. He cannot stay bonded to the symbiote for more than 48-hours at a time otherwise it'll be able to take full control. All right. It's slightly different this time around but for how long? It's sales have been slightly up the last few months but it's dropped by 30,000 copies in sales since it's start. That's never a good sign. So is it time to hang him up for a while? Absolutely. Give the guy a breather. Let fans build with anticipation for a while. Plot some things out. Make him relevant and force people to demand him.
Venom isn't outta the game yet but it may be close to benching him for the season.

Friday, May 11, 2012

Trailer Watch: Argo

Ben Affleck directs another movie that looks pretty damn awesome. I still say he should stick with this because Gone Baby Gone and the The Town were amazing films and this one looks to follow suit.

Thursday, May 10, 2012

Child of the 80's

Barnyard Commandos (1989)
Toy concepts were much cooler back in the day. As old as that makes me sound, it's true. Barnyard Commandos were one such joy.
Going through some old boxes I found our BC Cuffs from Burger King and am reminded of how far things have fallen. Barnyard is the story of farm animals that are mutated after consuming radioactive material left from army experiments. Now, this may sound stupid, but it's not. And if you think it is, than you are wrong. It was the R.A.M.S. (Rebel Army of Military Sheep) vs the P.O.R.K.S. (Platoon of Rebel Killer Swine) and the names right there should tell you how awesome it is.

Wednesday, May 9, 2012

NB of the Week

Speed Round!
(Spoils be listed From Her Out!)

Uncanny X-Force #25
Turns out somebody knows that Kid Apocalypse is at Wolverine's school. It also turns out that somebody (probably the some somebodies) don't like the Forcers and the Omega Clan (made from the original Omega Red) is there to do their bidding. Also, Psylock and Fantomex leave the team but who doesn't leave their team only to rejoin? Nothing big in that one.

New Avengers #26
Many years ago, in the hidden city of K'Un Lun (home to the Iron Fist and their many peoples) a vision was had of the fir bird fighting the dragon. After finding the red-haired girl in town that was in the vision, they began training her as the new Iron Fist so that she could battle this fire bird. While this may be a tie-in to AvX (Avengers versus X-Men), its still a damn cool back-story to the legend of the Iron Fist. Plus Deodato's art look amazing.

Artifacts #17
After the destruction of the Top Cow Universe, the Darkness was able to rebuild it as he sought fit. After finding out that he was unable to completely destroy the Angelus, he decided to separate the entity amongst many so that it's power would never be full again. As characters begin to find their new place in this new universe, Danielle Baptiste (once half the Witchblade and once full Angelus) meets her old girlfriend Finch for the first time in this new Universe. So does the Angelus. And the Angelus has found what appears to be a new, full host in Finch. Ron Marz is great and Stjepan Sejic's art is absolutely brilliant. Look him up.

Green Lantern #9
Hal Jordan begins to get answers about the Indigo Tribe. Turns out that after Abin Sur saved a planet called Nok, he and the only remaining inhabitant used the planet's energy to build weapons. After finding out that those weapons caused momentary remorse in the ones they struck, Abin had the man harness the energy into rings in order to transform the worst possible creatures into beings of compassion. His ultimate goal? After the prophesied Blackest Knight, he would need these beings and rings to help save everyone from what the Guardians of the Universe were going to do. Except now Abin is dead. Hearing this and seeing no hope left, the lone inhabitant of Nok destroys the energy source, destroying all the rings with it, leaving Hal on a planet with the most hardened monsters around. All of which have now been given their own minds and will back...

Saturday, May 5, 2012

Boobs of the Day

Hope Solo
During the NBA Playoffs, there have been a lot of Gatorade commercials. One in particular with a pretty hot soccer player in it. Turns out she's Hope Solo. It also turns out that she's pretty damned hot. I'd let her handle my soccer balls a bit if she wanted.

Wednesday, May 2, 2012

NB of the Week

DC's Second Wave
(Or at lest 2 of them...)
DC comics cancelled six of their non-selling comics and started six more this month. Four of those six came out today and I bought two. Both were great but one definitely stood out.

Dial H #1 - What's the 411?
China Mieville is an award-winning author from England. He is very smart and his writing is a bit intimidating at times (look him up). Dial H is a concept wherein somebody "dials in" to a device that gives them new powers (and identities) with each use. Put the two together and you get what could become a great ride. Nelson is a fat, outta shape dude but when he comes across his friend Darren being beat on, he tries to help. After being knocked around and somehow into a phone booth, he tries dialing for help. What he got was the new form of the "hero" Boy Chimney. Saving Darren and taking him to the hospital, Nelson learns his friend is in bigger trouble and maybe that phone booth is his solution.
Mieville does something here that I was very surprised to see and that channel the past. This book reads like one of those 80s, British written books that were so ground-breaking back then. Morrison's Animal Man and Doom Patrol, Gaiman's Sandman, Moore's Swamp Thing and Miracle Man. This book read as those did. Great story, weird set-up and characters and full of intrigue that will keep bringing me back.

Earth 2 #1 - The Price of Victory
Earth 2 is different from ours in one major way: Superman, Batman and Wonder Woman are dead. They died ending the Apokolips War. As they fight off the Parademons, Batman has a solution. A virus that will shut down their beacon towers which supply energy and commands to the Parademons. Once they are shut down, the Demons will literally fall from the sky. As he makes his way to upload it, Supes and WW must fend off the horde. Alas, there was just too many as Wonder Woman is killed by their leader, Steppenwolf, and Superman is taken out after being swarmed by the Demons. Batman is all that's left and he knows it wont last. He knows that after uploading the virus, he will die along with the first tower. His daughter and Supergirl follow a figure through a boom-tube portal (their adventure continues in World's Finest #1, also out today) and we are brought into current time, five years later. We get a quick scene of Alan Scott that will certainly lead into other things and are just as quickly moved to Jay Garrick as his college girl leaves him. As he sits, wondering what he is to do with his life, the God Mercury falls down to him, telling him a greater evil is coming and that a hero is needed.
This is the team book that I had hoped Justice League would be. What little team dynamic we did get was still great and you still felt each death of the big three even though we didn't know these versions. If you have read James Robinson's Starman, then you will love his take on the Society team.

Very promising starts to another round of books from the new DCU. If you found a bit lacking from he first wave, this is another great spot to jump on. Different than what they've given us so far and yet close enough that you can follow every bit. Definitely worth the shots.

Tuesday, May 1, 2012

S**t You Don't Know - 20

John Fransham fought his parliamentary campaign promising to prohibit people from making their beds more than once a week. He believed that daily bed making was "the height of effeminacy".

Trailer Watch: The Dark Knight Rises #3

No more needs be spoken...