Saturday, April 28, 2012

Boobs of the Day

Zatanna
I admit it: I've never been a big fan of the DCU's dyslexic heroine. And I'm actually still not, even after their huge reboot. What I am a fan of is her new costume change. For me, it's hands down better than the first and much sexier. Or, as sexy as a drawing of a fake lady can get. So it is with pleasure that I invite her into the club. With one stipulation though - od ton llac eht spoc no em.


Friday, April 27, 2012

Trailer Watch: Lawless

Shia LaDouche is in a new western movie and I could care less. Until I realized that Tom Hardy, Gary Oldman and Guy Pearce are also in it. The beginning of this trailer looks stupid but once it gets going, I got all kinds of jazzed. This should be a good one.
(EDIT - I was informed that this is not a Western but I stand by it. My closed mind says that if it's out west or even southern now-a-days, it's a western)

Guilty Pleasure #2

Pokemon
Yeah. You read that right. Pokemon. When this Japanese sensation first come over here to the states, I was one of the millions who were swept up in it. It was my first obsession, years before I started hording comics and toys. I was competing against my friend Bryan to see just who could catch them all and it was always him. Pokemon was the reason I got my first Game Boy. I had the games, the cards and the toys. I taped each episode that was on at six in the morning while I got ready for school and watched it the first chance I got. I went to Burger King each lunch break with Bryan and we each got two, sometimes three Kids Meals just so that we could get more of the toys when they had 'em. And yes, I do still have all my junk from it.
And I still get those warm feelings whenever I come across something Pokemon related. It's the nostalgia of it. Despite what I think now or what people think when looking back, it was big deal for me. Hell, I even did my big speech in class speech on it (and got an A, thank you very much).
True to geek form, I feel like nothing from Pokemon will ever beat the originals. Ash sounded like a little girl in the cartoon (probably voiced by one too), Misty was a whiny bitch, Brock wanted rape every chick he came around and Team Rocket were a gay and lesbian who wanted Pikachu just a little much. Fossils that somehow created extinct Pokemon, Evolution Stones that changed Pikachu into Raichu and bait and switch tactics to turn the worthless Magikarp into the badass Gyarados. 150 Pokemon plus the rumored and rare #151 Mew. Now there are 648 different Pokemon. How the shit is a kid suppose to follow all those?!
Anyhow, as most can attest to, I have matured plenty since those days. Pokemon may be gone but it shall never be forgotten. Especially since I never caught Raikou, Entei or Suicune. I'll find you fuckers eventually.

Wednesday, April 25, 2012

NB of the Week

I've got split ballots for this week thanks to two, great moments that wanna duke it out.
First off, we have
Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles #9
In which the gang, Casey and April go after the kidnapped Splinter. They track him and Old Hob to StockGen. After a quick break-in and some all around badassery, the Turtles bust down the door to find Hob and his scientist on the floor, Splinter missing once again. Here's where it gets even better. Who has now taken Splinter and is standing there on the last page, ready to start some ass-kicking of his own? Shredder. The baddie we've been waiting for. He's been mentioned and slightly seen (in the Leo one-shot) but not fully brought in. It's been nine, amazing issues and I can't wait for issue ten and beyond. Great series.
What moment could hold water against the introduction of Shredder? The final page in this month's
FF #17
With Johnny's return, he's looking for some stability again. Moving in with one Peter Parker is just the way to find that, right? Not if you're Peter Parker. Peter is trying to find a way to tell Johnny to move out the whole issue, always finding a reason to talk himself out of it. Until Pete walks into the bathroom for a shower. What he finds in there is too much and as soon as he shows Johnny, Johnny agrees that he should move out. What did they see in that bathroom? This...



Not much to do after finding Annihilus sitting on your can then to just walk away.

Tuesday, April 24, 2012

Brain Tunes

Godsmack - Rocky Mountain Way
I've never been a huge fan of Godsmack. They have some cool jams but they all sound the same to me (a horrible excuse, I know). However, upon hearing their cover of Joe Walsh's RMW, I have yet to get it outta my head. Nothing brilliant or mind-blowing but it's a good, loud version of a cool song.


Friday, April 20, 2012

Brain Tunes

Halestorm - Here's To Us
Apparently Glee covered this song which is too bad because that show is dookie and they probably ruined it. Either way, the new Halestorm album came out the other week and while I'm still unsure on how much I like it, this song became one of my favorites. I would guess it's because she says the f-word so many times.
FOUL LANGUAGE IS USED SO CAUTION TO THOSE WITH VIRGIN EARS


Thursday, April 19, 2012

NB of the Week

Rundown Rundown Rundown!

Wonder Woman #8 - Traveling to Hell to get back Zola, WW finds out that the weapons of the Gods can hurt her as Hades takes her as his soon to be bride.


Uncanny X-Force $24 - AoA Nightcrawler is good on his word to rid this world of other AoA counters as he reminds Iceman that fire shall always be his enemy. Good for you AoA Nightcrawler.



Green Lantern Corps #8 - Guy Gardner accepts a rank promotion from the Guardians (cuz that's gonna go so well) while John is arrested for killing a fellow Lantern


Age of Apocalypse #2 - As Sabretoother and Jean deal with being human, the X-Terminated find out that Cyclops is alive again thanks to Sugar Man and Beast. And he's not the only one they're bringing back.


X-Factor #234 - The Isolationist is back and plotting, his scantly clad, demon-chick "partner" is killing costumed dudes in Seattle and Jamie's dupe grabs Jamie's butt. His own butt? The real Jamie's butt.


TMNT Micro-Series: Leonardo - Now that Splinter has been taken, Leo sets out for him only to be attacked by The Foot. One on particular is not impressed with him. Shredder is coming at I couldn't be more excited.


Avengers #25 - Avengers vs. X-Men has begun which means we get a flashback story from the Avengers... At the end and in present time, The Protector (ie Captain Marvel, ie Marvel Boy, ie Noh-Varr) is contacted by the Supreme Intelligence and told to handle the coming Phoenix force himself.


Justice League #8 - Green Arrow really really really wants to be part of the team. Too bad Martian Manhunter messed that up for him before joining Stormwatch.

 
The Punisher #10 - Part 2 of The Omega Effect swings things away from DD as female Punisher (even Spidey can't figure out a name for her) seemingly double-crosses him, leaving him for the wolves as she takes the Omega Drive for herself.

Sunday, April 15, 2012

S**t You Don't Know - 19

Rabbis in the township of B'nei B'rak, Israel, banned hot pizza in fast food stores in 1991 because it could lead to improper contact between the sexes. The religious authorities explained that boys and girls might have to wait in line at stores for their pizza to heat and "might look at each other, which is an offense against modesty, or, God forbid, even touch each other". Cold pizza is, however, still legal.

Friday, April 13, 2012

Clif-Notes: Cabin in the Woods

How do I tell you of this movie without ruining it..... This may not be easy.
Cabin is about five friends who go out to the woods to spend the weekend at the cabin. Only things aren't what they seem. They're being watched and being set up, all for reasons you will never guess until they start telling you.
Written by Joss Whedon and Drew Goddard (Let Me In & Cloverfield), this movie had me locked the whole time. First off, it's much more comedy than they ever let you know. It's still very bloody (especially at the end) and has those tense moments where you're just waiting for something to jump out at ya but the jokes are what really makes this movie flow. The people behind it all look at it as just another day. They crack jokes, hope to see boobs and even take bets on how the campers will die.
And the end is ridiculous. In a great way. I definitely won't tell you what happens but it's something that should stay with you for a while. Unless you hate the movie, in which you'll try to forget it all. But why would you hate this amazing film? Answer: you won't. I actually wanted to stay in the theater and see it again. It was fun from start to finish and I loved it. Best movie of the year so far (sorry 21 Jump Street and Chronicle) and the best movie experience I've had in a while.

Thursday, April 12, 2012

NB of the Week

Work late blah blah blah blah comics.
Fantastic Four #605 - End of Line
Having rewritten the future, Reed and his father take a ride into the newly minted timeline to see how things are. What they find is not really surprising but not really the expected either. In the year 3012, Franklin Richards and Ben Grimm are the only two, constant members of the Fantastic Four. Turns out the serum that lets Ben change human once a year also stops him from aging outside of that week. The two of them are still fightin' and still running the Future Foundation.
In the year 4012, Ben has aged a bit more and appears to have stopped the fighting part of the family business. With Franklin off and Ben the only one left, congratulates all the graduating members of the Foundation, reminding them to have fun. To cherish their times and to never forget why it is that they're doing this. Reed seems a little more saddened by Ben's lonesomeness.
In 5012, Reed watches Ben talking to statues of Sue, Johnny and himself, telling them about how so much has changed and how he wishes he could ever find a hamburger again. But at least while Franklin is always gone, he still has them to talk to.
In 6012, Reed is heartbroken to see Franklin laying old Ben Grimm to rest, to finally join the family. Nobody there but Franklin and Ben.
As Reed has his father take them back to the present, we know how upset these sights have made him. He walks to the living room after grabbing two drinks and sits next to Ben who's watching some fights in the television
"You really gonna stick around?", asks Ben.
"If that's ok with you."
"I'm keepin' the remote. Rules are rules."
"Well.... All right."
"And you're sure you don't need to go build some kinda anti-doomsday thingee? Save the world or somethin'?"
"I'm good."
......
"I've missed you too, Stretch."
The Fantastic Four has been and should always be about family first. The heroics and the villains and the saving of the days is all under that category for them and Jonathan Hickman gets that. Reed will always feel guilty about what he did to his best friend. Ben will always lash out at that but still never hold it against him. At the end of the day, they are family and nothing can tear that down. Almost brings a tear to your eye.

The Best of the Rest
The Secret Service #1 - Mark Millar and Dave Gibbons bring you British spy games as never before. Plus, they kill Mark Hamill. Yes, the Mark Hamill.

Saga #2 - Near perfect writing from Vaughan brings another issue to life as I almost shit myself because of a giant spider lady.

Ultimate X-Men #10 - Storm tries to stop Stacey X from killing their captors after they cause a riot at the camp where they're held. Only problem is that every vote is split down the middle. Colossus proudly stops the tie as he crushes the head of one man. Guess they shouldn't have tortured him so much.

Green Lantern #8 - Turns out Abin Sur did create the Indigo Tribe and we find out that Indigo herself used to be Abin's sworn enemy. Also, Sinestro gets turned into an Indigo!?

Saturday, April 7, 2012

S**t You Don't Know - 18

In July 1993, retired Texan US Air Force Major Bill Smith filed a lawsuit in Fort Worth against the estate of Elvis Presley. Major Smith charged that Presley's estate had perpetrated a fraud by keeping up the pretense that the King had died in 1977. The Major complained that this had interfered with his attempts to sell his new book on Elvis' current whereabouts.

Friday, April 6, 2012

Cover Showcase

The Many Ghosts of Doctor Graves #60
A good lot of us geeks can agree on the fact that as good as art has become over the many years, there isn't much that can beat one of the old greats. Such is the case with this one. Ghosts was one of the many anthology titles that showcased monsters and ghouls and the like, "hosted" by Doctor M.T. Graves (yup). Steve Ditko is the father of this cover (to the best of my knowledge) and it makes me wish he would have stayed at Marvel longer. At least we get sweet covers like this one though. Not so sure about that giant sword she has but we'll forgive it because the rest is so amazing.


I'd Buy 'Em

Some dude somewhere (not the important parts) made himself some Star Wars Condoms. Not sure if one could measure the irony in it but at least they would stay mint in package just like our toys. I'm for it.


Wednesday, April 4, 2012

NB of the Week

Ultimate Spider-Man #9
Spidey's uncle in the Prowler. Scorpion wants to take over as the new Kingpin. Bendis is still great in this title and Sara Pichelli's art is brilliant (the issue says it's another artist but if it is, this guy looks exactly like Pichelli's art so I'm going with his name being wrong). Mostly, I'm pretty sure I like Miles as Spider-Man better than I liked Peter Parker. Probably in part because he had Pete before him to kinda show him the ways but mostly because Miles isn't a cry baby. He takes is seriously, doubts himself the same but doesn't mope about it. When his going gets tough, he shuts up and gets tough back and I love it. You should be reading this book if you're not.

The Best of the Rest
Fatale #4 - Mystery still lingers as the hatted men get closer to their target. Brubaker on these kind of titles is what makes comics so versatile.

Stormwatch #8 - Sadly, Paul Cornell is now off this title but this two-issue story by Paul Jenkins was quite good and Peter Milligan is coming on board so I still have high hopes.

Daredevil #10.1 - A quick recap issue that also leads into the Omega Effect story that runs through this, Punisher and Avenging Spider-Man this month. DD had a device with intel from five different terrorist organizations and they all want it back. And they all want Murdock out of the picture to get it.

Tuesday, April 3, 2012

Trailer Watch: Ted

Caught the R rated trailer for Seth McFarlane's new movie Ted, staring Mark Wahlberg and Mila Kunis and it pretty much made me pee my little panties. Give it a watch. July 13th can't come fast enough.
R RATED TRAILER SO DIRTY HUMOR AND FOUL LANGUAGE CERTAINLY FOLLOWS.